Soaring, flying, graduating
I am a fan of High School Musical. This is not something I’m ashamed of. I once sat in the Disney store for an hour so my parents would buy me a Gabriella doll…
…Just so you know my level of dedication to things.
Around the time I finished my A-Levels, I watched High School Musical 3, which is all about preparing to go to university and the emotions that come with that.
At the moment, I am feeling a lot of emotions having finished university. For the last month or so, I have felt quite anxious about… Nothing? I am so used to being worried about a deadline or passing shorthand or whatever, that it doesn’t feel right having all that go away. To have passed everything, somehow. I haven’t really had the opportunity to feel proud of myself, as it still feels like something still needs to be done.
One of the biggest things for me was handing over my student magazine Platform. I imagine it’s how Troy Bolton felt handing over the reins as captain of the basketball team. I’ve managed to let go (just about), but now I feel like I’ve lost a bit of purpose. I’d spend every day editing articles, talking to people, and arranging things. I do have a big project coming up in the summer, but Platform will always my baby. My boyfriend said that he hopes I find something to invest myself in as much as I love Platform. I really hope so too.
A lot of people in my year have already got graduate jobs, which is also quite scary to see. Like Sharpay seeing her brother getting into Julliard instead of her. I haven’t applied for any graduate jobs, as 1) it’s daunting and 2) there aren’t that many graduate jobs in magazines. I applied to freelance somewhere and the editor running it did a tweet straight after about soon-to-be journalists being very unsuitable. Where are we supposed to start? How do we bop to the top? As I’ve said before, sometimes it definitely feels like no amount of experience is enough.
I’ve become such an independent, confident person over the last few years, and I don’t want to go back to Lichfield, where there is nothing for me. Our local paper has been bought out by a big firm, and had one writer last time I counted. I asked the magazine, which is loaded with old press releases and clipart ads, if I could give them a hand and they ignored me. But I think there is much more I want to do than that.
The funny thing is, my old high school, which my brother is going to start attending in September, has invited him to a production of High School Musical. Naturally, I was very upset I wasn’t given the opportunity to star as Gabriella (not that I would have got the role with my voice). However, I thought it was nicely symbolic. Coming full circle, in a way.
Hopefully now I’ve broken free, I’ll be able to soar and fly, and there won’t be a star in Heaven that I can’t reach. If I try. Fingers crossed. Wish me luck.